To "one day make it raw"? "LET'S START TODAY!" (song from a punk/hc band Gorilla Biscuits).

That would be great, to do a kinda acrobatic performance and let people know that you can do that, you can do amazing dynamic performing, strength enduring activities on raw! It's possible!

pea: Gorilla Biscuits is a brilliant name! lol. and i dont mind their music either. and yeah... it will stay a "one day" for now lol. i have lots of other things demanding my focus right now, but the idea of an educational and entertaining raw performance will stay in the back of my mind and when the time is right it will get the focus it deserves

Now.. im logging my food and exercise into Nutridiary...but its really hard to do the exercise when it doesnt have juggling or trapeze or spending 2 hours busking with contact juggling... so i went for punching a bag, coz its almost all arms and its kinda fast, general gymnastics and low/med intensity calisthenics respectively. i guess thats about close enough. unicycling is in there tho which is pretty cool lol.

and i went for a run as a warm up hehe. only two laps of my uni, which i looked up on a map to be almost exactly 1km per lap, so 2km for starters. we'll see where this running thing goes. i actually really enjoyed it. i was only gonna do one lap, and i expected to need to rest in that (ive tried running in the past lol without great results) so i set myself a limit 'get up to here and then you can walk for a lil bit' but i got there and felt fine so i extended it and chose another spot... got there and felt fine... so i kept going and got to the end of my lap and felt good so i stopped for a lil bathroom break and then went off again for another lap. i walked for about 30 seconds half way through this second lap and then ran the rest of the way, and made myself run to the far door of my building instead of the closer one to make up for the rest lol. and extra 20meters or so counts right? hehe.

now, according to Nutridiary, i didnt meet my Caloric needs today. or, to talk like a normal person, i didnt eat enough. i missed my estimated calorie requirement by almost 1700 kcal.  this doesnt bother me overmuch for now. i felt like i ate plenty. wasnt low on energy. felt great in fact. but this leads me to something ive been wondering. i have a little pudge i could afford to lose. not much, just a little around the belly and love-handles lol. so, if you have fat you can use/lose, how much below your calorie requirement is it ok to be? i dont wanna start feeling run down, weak or tired. thats the whole reason im going to use nutridiary for a while, to make sure im eating enough during the day to keep the cook food cravings at bay...

back to school on monday, and busking tomorrow, as well as heading in to school to train a bit and try and get some of my good form back a little quicker after this rest lol. i have to do trapeze and web assessments asap because the strained ab before the holidays prevented me doing them, but i got on the trapeze today and am a little behind where i need to be for those. so train train training for me its a good life hehe

yeah its a bit of work, not really its pretty user friendly, but just keeping track of all your food and then putting it in and same with your exercise and blah blah blah. but ihave to do that stuff for school anyway, so ive really only got to transfer it across. its a pain in the butt when it doesnt have the food im after listed though lol... which brings me to todays main topic:

MANGOSTEEN!

oh my is this not the single most delicious beautiful and all around orgasm inducing fruit in the world!!! i tried my first one today, went to the fruit and veg shop and bought a ton of fruit, and picked up a few fruits i have never tried. Persimmons (and if anyone has any advice on how to tell when theyre ripe id love to hear it) and a Kiwano which i am yet to try.. and one Mangosteen, just to see what theyre like. and oh my god theyre divine! so sweet and silky and luscious and oooooooooooo  ..... i was short of breath with my passion for mangosteen lol. now, at $20 a kilo i wont be getting many unfortunately, but i think i will go back and pick up at least a few more hehe. oh *swoon*.. i wish i had more *now* hehe.

first day back at school rocked quite nicely... i did miss my friends over the break. a few in particular. i feel ive made some real life friends at this place. im lucky enough to study with some really spectacular shining people. sharing their company every day is something im truly grateful for, especially in a situation as stressful as our school can be sometimes.

other than that.. started doubles trapeze which is pretty cool.. tho my legs are gonna have bruises tomorrow let me tell you! hanging by my knees and supporting not only my 72kg weight but a whole nother 75kg guy is quite a feat lol. and i also landed a move on static trapeze, quite easily, that i didnt think i was able to do. i had never done it before and in my head it seemed very close to, but slightly harder than, another move i struggle with. so of course i kept telling myself "i cant do that" and not even trying, for fear of smashing my shins on the bar. but today i had to. i said "i cant do it" as i went for it, said it out loud, and like a kick in the teeth, pulled it off near perfectly! thats what you get when you mess with me Doubts! and i'll do it again too, so youd better watch out! lol. no more doubting myself!

also did well in some head bouncing a ball, got close to my record twice in a row. getting MUCH better at slackline, far faster than i thought i would. got lots of positive comments on my form in ballet, which is one of our hardest classes physically. its an hour of go go go, legs straight, i know it hurts, no pain no gain, point your toes, spin spin spin, intensity. i love it. adagio (acro-balance) was ok. and Feldenkrais conditioning was beautiful and relaxing, as always.

so tonight im going to write myself a training regime to do every day in the hour after school to increase my strength. then maybe run through some of it. and i suppose i'll post it when im done, or some time over the next few days when im done tweaking it.

but for now, its dinner time!!! oh salad here i come!

Hi Ant. Look at you go! Mangosteens are gorgeous aren't they. Mmmmm. Persimmons are ripe when they get a little soft but still firm. they are so damned nice! I had three this afternoon. Enjoy!

xoxoxo

thanks guys, much appreciated! i have 6 or 7 of them so i figure i will wait a few days and see if they soften up and then cut one open and give it a go...

so today i was walking along and i realised i felt truly wonderful. about life the universe and everything. i caught a thought, as it drifted through my head, that really stuck out as unusual for me. i thought "If there is a God.. i think me and It are ok with each other." this is an odd thought for me. i was raised to be very anti-religious. and even after i started to think for myself the stage i have been at for a long time is a sort-of-negative "If there is a God.. i dont care, i will leave It alone and It can leave me alone"... todays thought was more than that.. id had a lot of warmth and positivity in it..

and that got me thinking about what has changed in my life from how it used to be. I'm making money doing something i love and bringing a few moments of joy and magic into peoples lives. I'm studying to be able to do that even better, and be better at the things i love. I'm in a wonderful healthy relationship with a girl i adore. I am eating raw and exercising and feeling healthier than i have in a long long time, expecting to soon feel healthier than ever (once this damn detox is done lol). when i think about the future it is so full of possibilities that i almost feel there cant be enough time for them all... in short, whats changed is EVERYTHING! and that reminded me of this quote from the very first of the Carlos Castaneda books, The Teachings Of Don Juan:

“Anything is one of a million paths. Therefore, a warrior must always keep in mind that a path is only a path; if he feels that he should not follow it, he must not stay with it under any conditions. His decision to keep on that path or to leave it must be free of fear or ambition. He must look at every path closely and deliberately. There is a question that a warrior has to ask, mandatorily: 'Does this path have a heart?'

All paths are the same: they lead nowhere. However, a path without a heart is never enjoyable. On the other hand, a path with heart is easy—it does not make a warrior work at liking it; it makes for a joyful journey; as long as a man follows it, he is one with it.”

tonight i realised that for the first time i truly feel i am on a path with heart.

What a beautiful post Ant. It's wonderful to hear you sounding so at peace. I love your posts. They are always uplifting!

xoxoxo

Hey Ant, we see in others what we ourselves radiate.... what do you see in this man? 

xoxoxo

hey lovely raw folks (and any lovely folks reading this who dont happen to be raw. hi to you too )

im doin good lately... today ive seriously undereaten though. i thought i had bananas at school so i only brought a few with me... turns out all i had was 3 apples... so all day i ate like 5 or 6 bananas and 3 apples. i felt good and had fine energy all day but by 6pm i was getting grumpy from low energy and knew i still had a big workout ahead of me, and it was the first day of the new workout plan i set for myself so i didnt want to skip it. so i caved and bought a commercial non raw fruit and nut bar thingy. not beating myself up over it. i needed energy and i bought a crappy fruit and nut thing rather than a cookie or some chocolate so it was the best i could do in the situation. they need fruit vending machines. seriously. theres something messed up (i nearly swore then.. wow i am low on sugar lol) about a society where it is so freakin hard just to get a piece of fruit. there were bananas at the icecream shop at the mall near my school... BUT THEY COULDNT/WOULDNT SELL ME ONE! i would have had to buy a banana split just to get a banana! its absurd!

ok... now after that little tirade... im going to admit how much of a doofus i am... and admit that there is a New World (ie Coles) at the mall i was at... and i didnt even think of it, coz i never ever shop there. i seriously was typing that and went.. "hang on... theres a.... oh you fool!" lol. so really, its not that hard to get a banana. im just not very bright when im tired lol. hehe now i feel silly 

ANYWAY!

so now im slamming down the bananas. 10 down. plenty more to go. actually i think i only have about 6 left. then its on to the persimmons.

so tonight, after doing acrobalance and ballet and all that fun stuff at school, i did

10 handstand pushups. all in one set. and nice deep ones too. HELL YEAH!
20 diamond pushups. dropped to knees at about 14
20 wide pushups. i think i hit my knees at about 6 and had to have rests to get to 20 lol
another 1 handstand pushup lol.
20 overhand chinup lowers. not real chinups, you use legs to lift yourself to a position with your chin over the bar and then slowly slowly lower yourself down.
10 tricep dips. planned on 20 but couldnt get past ten.
another 10 overhand chinup lowers.
20 hands above my head, down to chest, down to butt thingys on the total gym. i dont know what theyre called.
climbed the web once. only made it half way up.
20 shoulder shurg thingys with dumbels that said 10kg each but i think were actually ten pounds (ie 4kg)
20 thingys with dumbels opening arms like wings over a fitball to work back muscles lol. 5kg (or pound) dumbels this time

it didnt feel like a lot at the time... even tho my arms couldnt take any more. but it looks like a lot now that ive written it out lol. i think next time, on thursday, i will include bicep curls as well. and some underhand chinup lowers.

so tomorrow its legs and core! looking forward to it!

ooo and i bought another waterpolo ball today :D i wanted to get two more, so i would have three and i could start juggling them, but the store only had one in the size i need. so i'll have to hunt around to find another, and eventually another 2 after that lol..

hope youre all having a splendid day.. im off to blend up more bananas! hnnnnnnnnnn

-ant